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Christmas Madness, Mayhem, and Mall Santas by Bonnie Daly Pdf
Leaving no stone unturned—or present unwrapped—Christmas Madness, Mayhem, & Mall Santas takes you on a hilarious journey through the misadventures, mishaps, and misguided sentiments that we all deal with during the Christmas season. Be prepared to laugh in the face of holiday stress, as you delve into such topics as parent-proof packaging, cats vs. Christmas trees, bows that don't stick, lights that won't light, and husbands that won't help, as well as a multitude of other misaligned, multifaceted merriment.
The Totally Disturbing Christmas Joke Book by Bonnie Daly Pdf
The Totally Disturbing Christmas Joke Book: 100 Delightfully Demented Jokes Designed to Jingle Your Sleigh Bells--with jokes such as: "Why does Santa go down the Chimney? Because slithering up the sewer pipe makes his suit smell," and "Why do you hang ornaments on a Christmas tree? Because hanging them on your paraplegic uncle is just wrong"--is a compilation of edgy, twisted, festive fun, sure to liven up your holiday season.
The Onion Presents: Christmas Exposed by The Onion Staff Pdf
Christmas wouldn’t be Christmas without impulse-priced holiday gift books—and now The Onion has unleashed its award-winning team of investigative journalists upon the genre. Christmas Exposed features more than one hundred shocking tales of Secret Santas, shopping mall mayhem, dysfunctional family dinners, and much, much more.
Bursting with jokes that will make you laugh till you cry--or perhaps cry till you laugh--The Totally Lame Joke Book covers a wide range of topics, including everything from rednecks to farm animals, aliens to frogs, and old ladies to proctologists. It's a truly hilarious, fresh line up of original riddles that anyone of any age will enjoy.
“The undisputed king of the comic crime novel.” —Providence Journal Nobody does Florida weirdness quite like Tim Dorsey! Case in point: When Elves Attack, the New York Times bestselling author’s twisted Christmas present to his legion of adoring fans who can’t get enough of thrill-killer and Sunshine State historian Serge A. Storms, the most endearing psychopath since Dexter. Dorsey offers the perfect antidote for all those sappy feel-good holiday stories with this zany blockbuster extravaganza in which his wonderfully deranged serial killer Floridaphile delivers his special brand of Christmas cheer. More outrageous than Santa Claus in a Speedo, When Elves Attack serves up a Yuletide feast of the “pure gonzo humor” the New York Times Book Review enthusiastically attributes to this fearlessly funny writer. Think Bad Santa and National Lampoon’s Family Vacation, blend in Dorsey’s trademark appetite for destruction, and you’ve got hilarious crime fiction black comedy that anyone would be thrilled to discover stuffed in their Christmas stocking.
The Book of (Holiday) Awesome by Neil Pasricha Pdf
“Neil Pasricha is a gift. This book would make even the grinchiest Grinch love the holidays again.”—A. J. Jacobs There’s nothing like the holidays. They bring out the best, and sometimes the worst, in everyone. Luckily, Neil Pasricha is here to remind us that not only are the holidays great, but there’s actually even more to celebrate than we realize. From Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa, to other holidays throughout the year, such as Mother’s Day and Thanksgiving, The Book of (Holiday) Awesome will show you why holidays are...AWESOME. • Making the first footprint in fresh snow • When the in-laws leave • Waking up and realizing it’s Christmas • Just barely wrapping a gift with that tiny scrap of leftover wrapping paper • When they finally stop playing Christmas songs on the radio • Knowing “Kwanzaa” is worth more Scrabble points than “Hanukkah” or “Christmas”
Pru Kilcannon has one goal when she wakes on Christmas Eve - to perform the most "Random Acts of Christmas Kindness" so she can spread cheer and ensure her high school wins the county-wide "RACK IT UP" contest. But when her friends decide to team up with their boyfriends, the ever-helpful Dogmothers enlist the new kid in school as Pru's partner for the contest. And that means good-girl Pru has to spend the entire day with the broody, moody, and crazy cute bad boy Lucas Darling, and his chaos-causing greyhound, Tor.As if that wasn't enough holiday havoc, Pru and Lucas have to accompany the grannies on a secret mission to check out a man Yiayia has met on an online dating service. Gramma Finnie is convinced Aldo Fiore is a mobster, Yiayia thinks he's her dream man, and Pru just wants to be sure her great-grandmothers don't get themselves arrested - or worse. There's no telling what could happen when the Dogmothers spy on an eighty-year-old who might be playing a rather flirtatious Santa at the mall?or might be hiding from the Feds.But no one expected the real trouble to come from Tor, the former racing dog who causes mayhem and mall madness. As Pru and Lucas attempt to control Tor, supervise the Santa Stalking, and knock out a few random acts of kindness?they also give in to a delicious little Christmas crush that just might lead to some magic under the mistletoe this year!
Diana and her friends are shopping for Christmas gifts at the newly opened Crossroads Mall when a sudden snowstorm traps them inside. They're having so much fun, they don't mind. That is, until Diana's friends are killed off--one by one. Hiding in the mall is a twisted killer with a Christmas list of his own.
Three new Marvel holiday stories, including a riff on A Christmas Carol starring Spider-Man, plus selections from past holiday issues of Marvel Comics.
'Living as Form' grew out of a major exhibition at Creative Time in New York City. Like the exhibition, the book is a landmark survey of more than 100 projects selected by a 30-person curatorial advisory team; each project is documented by a selection of colour images.
Official U.S. edition with full color illustrations throughout. NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER Yuval Noah Harari, author of the critically-acclaimed New York Times bestseller and international phenomenon Sapiens, returns with an equally original, compelling, and provocative book, turning his focus toward humanity’s future, and our quest to upgrade humans into gods. Over the past century humankind has managed to do the impossible and rein in famine, plague, and war. This may seem hard to accept, but, as Harari explains in his trademark style—thorough, yet riveting—famine, plague and war have been transformed from incomprehensible and uncontrollable forces of nature into manageable challenges. For the first time ever, more people die from eating too much than from eating too little; more people die from old age than from infectious diseases; and more people commit suicide than are killed by soldiers, terrorists and criminals put together. The average American is a thousand times more likely to die from binging at McDonalds than from being blown up by Al Qaeda. What then will replace famine, plague, and war at the top of the human agenda? As the self-made gods of planet earth, what destinies will we set ourselves, and which quests will we undertake? Homo Deus explores the projects, dreams and nightmares that will shape the twenty-first century—from overcoming death to creating artificial life. It asks the fundamental questions: Where do we go from here? And how will we protect this fragile world from our own destructive powers? This is the next stage of evolution. This is Homo Deus. With the same insight and clarity that made Sapiens an international hit and a New York Times bestseller, Harari maps out our future.
Abby and Emma aren't just best friends. They're more like two life forces sharing the same soul, certain the ties that bind them can weather any storm. Then Gretchen comes into their lives, blowing across the landscape of their friendship like a hurricane. Will Abby and Emma survive Gretchen?Surviving Gretchen, the first book in Bonnie Daly's The Storms of Friendship series, is a captivating tale about what happens when the bond between two thirteen-year-old girls is threatened by the dark, swirling depths of another girl's jealousy. The story reveals the importance of true friendship, mutual trust, and never taking the people you love for granted.
The first collection to address the collective transformation happening in response to the rise of social media With the rise of web 2.0 and social media platforms taking over vast tracts of territory on the internet, the media landscape has shifted drastically in the past 20 years, transforming previously stable relationships between media creators and consumers. The Social Media Reader is the first collection to address the collective transformation with pieces on social media, peer production, copyright politics, and other aspects of contemporary internet culture from all the major thinkers in the field. Culling a broad range and incorporating different styles of scholarship from foundational pieces and published articles to unpublished pieces, journalistic accounts, personal narratives from blogs, and whitepapers, The Social Media Reader promises to be an essential text, with contributions from Lawrence Lessig, Henry Jenkins, Clay Shirky, Tim O'Reilly, Chris Anderson, Yochai Benkler, danah boyd, and Fred von Loehmann, to name a few. It covers a wide-ranging topical terrain, much like the internet itself, with particular emphasis on collaboration and sharing, the politics of social media and social networking, Free Culture and copyright politics, and labor and ownership. Theorizing new models of collaboration, identity, commerce, copyright, ownership, and labor, these essays outline possibilities for cultural democracy that arise when the formerly passive audience becomes active cultural creators, while warning of the dystopian potential of new forms of surveillance and control.