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Holding on to Love After You've Lost a Baby by Gary Chapman,Candy McVicar Pdf
A Powerful Resource for Grieving Couples Losing a child is among the most tragic experiences one can face. The crushing grief puts immense strain on the marriage, family relationships, and friendships that few can understand. That’s why this book was written. In it Candy McVicar, a grieving mom who leads a ministry for grieving parents, and Dr. Gary Chapman, relationship expert and author of The 5 Love Languages®, team up to help couples who are facing the unimaginable. They’ll teach you how to: Cope with the complex feelings that come with the grief process Understand your spouse’s unique grieving needs and support him/her Use the five love languages through grief There is nothing that can make the pain of losing a child go away, but healing is possible with intentional hearts and the right resources.
When a loved one dies we mourn our loss. We take comfort in the rituals that mark the passing, and we turn to those around us for support. But what happens when there is no closure, when a family member or a friend who may be still alive is lost to us nonetheless? How, for example, does the mother whose soldier son is missing in action, or the family of an Alzheimer's patient who is suffering from severe dementia, deal with the uncertainty surrounding this kind of loss? In this sensitive and lucid account, Pauline Boss explains that, all too often, those confronted with such ambiguous loss fluctuate between hope and hopelessness. Suffered too long, these emotions can deaden feeling and make it impossible for people to move on with their lives. Yet the central message of this book is that they can move on. Drawing on her research and clinical experience, Boss suggests strategies that can cushion the pain and help families come to terms with their grief. Her work features the heartening narratives of those who cope with ambiguous loss and manage to leave their sadness behind, including those who have lost family members to divorce, immigration, adoption, chronic mental illness, and brain injury. With its message of hope, this eloquent book offers guidance and understanding to those struggling to regain their lives. Table of Contents: 1. Frozen Grief 2. Leaving without Goodbye 3. Goodbye without Leaving 4. Mixed Emotions 5. Ups and Downs 6. The Family Gamble 7. The Turning Point 8. Making Sense out of Ambiguity 9. The Benefit of a Doubt Notes Acknowledgments Reviews of this book: You will find yourself thinking about the issues discussed in this book long after you put it down and perhaps wishing you had extra copies for friends and family members who might benefit from knowing that their sorrows are not unique...This book's value lies in its giving a name to a force many of us will confront--sadly, more than once--and providing personal stories based on 20 years of interviews and research. --Pamela Gerhardt, Washington Post Reviews of this book: A compassionate exploration of the effects of ambiguous loss and how those experiencing it handle this most devastating of losses ... Boss's approach is to encourage families to talk together, to reach a consensus about how to mourn that which has been lost and how to celebrate that which remains. Her simple stories of families doing just that contain lessons for all. Insightful, practical, and refreshingly free of psychobabble. --Kirkus Review Reviews of this book: Engagingly written and richly rewarding, this title presents what Boss has learned from many years of treating individuals and families suffering from uncertain or incomplete loss...The obvious depth of the author's understanding of sufferers of ambiguous loss and the facility with which she communicates that understanding make this a book to be recommended. --R. R. Cornellius, Choice Reviews of this book: Written for a wide readership, the concepts of ambiguous loss take immediate form through the many provocative examples and stories Boss includes, All readers will find stories with which they will relate...Sensitive, grounded and practical, this book should, in my estimation, be required reading for family practitioners. --Ted Bowman, Family Forum Reviews of this book: Dr. Boss describes [the] all-too-common phenomenon [of unresolved grief] as resulting from either of two circumstances: when the lost person is still physically present but emotionally absent or when the lost person is physically absent but still emotionally present. In addition to senility, physical presence but psychological absence may result, for example, when a person is suffering from a serious mental disorder like schizophrenia or depression or debilitating neurological damage from an accident or severe stroke, when a person abuses drugs or alcohol, when a child is autistic or when a spouse is a workaholic who is not really 'there' even when he or she is at home...Cases of physical absence with continuing psychological presence typically occur when a soldier is missing in action, when a child disappears and is not found, when a former lover or spouse is still very much missed, when a child 'loses' a parent to divorce or when people are separated from their loved ones by immigration...Professionals familiar with Dr. Boss's work emphasised that people suffering from ambiguous loss were not mentally ill, but were just stuck and needed help getting past the barrier or unresolved grief so that they could get on with their lives. --Asian Age Combining her talents as a compassionate family therapist and a creative researcher, Pauline Boss eloquently shows the many and complex ways that people can cope with the inevitable losses in contemporary family life. A wise book, and certain to become a classic. --Constance R. Ahrons, author of The Good Divorce A powerful and healing book. Families experiencing ambiguous loss will find strategies for seeing what aspects of their loved ones remain, and for understanding and grieving what they have lost. Pauline Boss offers us both insight and clarity. --Kathy Weingarten, Ph.D, The Family Institute of Cambridge, Harvard Medical School
Too Much Loss: Coping with Grief Overload by Alan Wolfelt Pdf
Grief overload is what you feel when you experience too many significant losses all at once, in a relatively short period of time, or cumulatively. In addition to the deaths of loved ones, such losses can also include divorce, estrangement, illness, relocation, job changes, and more. Our minds and hearts have enough trouble coping with a single loss, so when the losses pile up, the grief often seems especially chaotic and defeating. The good news is that through intentional, active mourning, you can and will find your way back to hope and healing. This compassionate guide will show you how.
Continuing Bonds by Dennis Klass,Phyllis R. Silverman,Steven Nickman Pdf
First published in 1996. This new book gives voice to an emerging consensus among bereavement scholars that our understanding of the grief process needs to be expanded. The dominant 20th century model holds that the function of grief and mourning is to cut bonds with the deceased, thereby freeing the survivor to reinvest in new relationships in the present. Pathological grief has been defined in terms of holding on to the deceased. Close examination reveals that this model is based more on the cultural values of modernity than on any substantial data of what people actually do. Presenting data from several populations, 22 authors - among the most respected in their fields - demonstrate that the health resolution of grief enables one to maintain a continuing bond with the deceased. Despite cultural disapproval and lack of validation by professionals, survivors find places for the dead in their on-going lives and even in their communities. Such bonds are not denial: the deceased can provide resources for enriched functioning in the present. Chapters examine widows and widowers, bereaved children, parents and siblings, and a population previously excluded from bereavement research: adoptees and their birth parents. Bereavement in Japanese culture is also discussed, as are meanings and implications of this new model of grief. Opening new areas of research and scholarly dialogue, this work provides the basis for significant developments in clinical practice in the field.
Though one in four pregnancies ends in loss, miscarriage is shrouded in such secrecy and stigma that the woman who experiences it often feels deeply isolated, unsure how to process her grief. Her body seems to have betrayed her. Her confidence in the goodness of God is rattled. Her loved ones don't know what to say. Her heart is broken. She may feel guilty, ashamed, angry, depressed, confused, or alone. With vulnerability and tenderness, Adriel Booker shares her own experience of three consecutive miscarriages, as well as the stories of others. She tackles complex questions about faith and suffering with sensitivity and clarity, inviting women to a place of grace, honesty, and hope in the redemptive purposes of God without offering religious clichés and pat answers. She also shares specific, practical resources, such as ways to help guide children through grief, suggestions for memorializing your baby, and advice on pregnancy after loss, as well as a special section for dads and loved ones.
“The tumultuous feelings that accompany pregnancy loss are hard to describe, and women who experience this often feel terribly alone in their grief. But All the Love, written by three wise and compassionate women, offers much-needed understanding, consolation, wisdom, and hope. Its heartfelt and caring message will provide solace and guidance to those who have lost babies as well as those who seek to support them.” –Christine Gross-Loh Author, Parenting Without Borders and co-author, The Path All the Love: Healing Your Heart and Finding Meaning After Pregnancy Loss is a book dedicated to supporting and empowering women and their partners through miscarriage, stillbirth, and other types of pregnancy loss. The book is part memoir, part therapy session; combining the personal story of Kim Hooper, who endured four losses, with therapeutic insights from Meredith Resnick (a licensed social worker) and Dr. Huong Diep (a board-certified psychologist). It is our hope that reading this book feels like sitting and chatting with someone about their experience, while therapist-friends listen in to provide clarity and comfort. All the Love is the most in-depth book available to console women and partners in the wake of pregnancy loss. Topics include how to navigate the medical part of pregnancy loss, the emotional rollercoaster of grief, connecting with your partner, returning to “normal” life, rediscovering yourself, deciding whether to try again and having a baby after a loss. The book touches on considerations for LGBTQ+ couples and people facing racial, cultural, or socioeconomic issues that compound their grief. For a loss that is so common, each woman’s story is beautifully unique. We want each woman to feel seen in this book. We want her to feel validated and hopeful as she steps into what’s next on her journey.
The Marriage You've Always Wanted by Gary Chapman Pdf
From America's favorite marriage expert and author of the New York Times #1 bestseller, The 5 Love Languages® Respected marriage counselor Gary Chapman looks at the key issues that will help you build the marriage you've always wanted, answering such real-life questions as . . . Why won't they change? Why do we always fight about tasks and responsibilities? Why should we have to work at sex? In the warm, practical style that has endeared him to audiences worldwide, Dr. Chapman delivers advice on all the "big issues," like: Money Communication Decision making In-laws and much more Each chapter includes a "Your Turn" opportunity for reflection and interaction between spouses. Discover the "joy potential" in your marriage and your "ministry potential" for God!
In the bestselling tradition of The Five People You Meet in Heaven and Humans of New York comes a collection of authentic, emotional, and inspiring stories about life’s most important moments, as curated by the editors at Love What Matters. “90% of the reads bring me to tears. I just can't believe the love this world truly has when all we see is hate. This is so uplifting.” —Shelsea Where do you go when you want to feel inspired? When you want to forget about the divisiveness and the anger? For over five million people, that place is Love What Matters, a digital platform dedicated to finding and sharing the daily moments of kindness, compassion, and love that so often go overlooked. This curated collection of powerful stories features first person accounts and photographs that perfectly capture each moment: A husband learning he’s about to be a dad. A new mom embracing her body. A cashier inadvertently teaching a young girl a lesson about patience. A bagel from a stranger that saved a homeless man’s life. From long overdue adoptions to military heroes returning home; from a fireman’s touching 9/11 tribute to what an old dinner plate found at a bake sale can teach us all about life—these are the moments that matter. They are genuine. Authentic. Raw. And they are perfect in their imperfection—just like all of us. You will no doubt experience goosebumps and tears, but this mosaic of life’s moments will leave you with something even more profound: a reminder that, in the end, love always wins. “This really is the best page on Facebook. It renews your love of humanity. There are still good people. We need more reports of acts of kindness.” —Johnny
How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids by Jancee Dunn Pdf
"Get this for your pregnant friends, or yourself" (People): a hilariously candid account of one woman's quest to bring her post-baby marriage back from the brink, with life-changing, real-world advice. Recommended by Nicole Cliffe in Slate Featured in People Picks A Red Tricycle Best Baby and Toddler Parenting Book of the Year One of Mother magazine's favorite parenting books of the Year How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids tackles the last taboo subject of parenthood: the startling, white-hot fury that new (and not-so-new) mothers often have for their mates. After Jancee Dunn had her baby, she found that she was doing virtually all the household chores, even though she and her husband worked equal hours. She asked herself: How did I become the 'expert' at changing a diaper? Many expectant parents spend weeks researching the best crib or safest car seat, but spend little if any time thinking about the titanic impact the baby will have on their marriage - and the way their marriage will affect their child. Enter Dunn, her well-meaning but blithely unhelpful husband, their daughter, and her boisterous extended family, who show us the ways in which outmoded family patterns and traditions thwart the overworked, overloaded parents of today. On the brink of marital Armageddon, Dunn plunges into the latest relationship research, solicits the counsel of the country's most renowned couples' and sex therapists, canvasses fellow parents, and even consults an FBI hostage negotiator on how to effectively contain an "explosive situation." Instead of having the same fights over and over, Dunn and her husband must figure out a way to resolve their larger issues and fix their family while there is still time. As they discover, adding a demanding new person to your relationship means you have to reevaluate -- and rebuild -- your marriage. In an exhilarating twist, they work together to save the day, happily returning to the kind of peaceful life they previously thought was the sole province of couples without children. Part memoir, part self-help book with actionable and achievable advice, How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids is an eye-opening look at how the man who got you into this position in this first place is the ally you didn't know you had.
Women who opt not to be mothers are frequently warned that they will regret their decision later in life, yet we rarely talk about the possibility that the opposite might also be true—that women who have children might regret it. Drawing on years of research interviewing women from a variety of socioeconomic, educational, and professional backgrounds, sociologist Orna Donath treats regret as a feminist issue: as regret marks the road not taken, we need to consider whether alternative paths for women currently are blocked off. She asks that we pay attention to what is forbidden by rules governing motherhood, time, and emotion, including the cultural assumption that motherhood is a “natural” role for women—for the sake of all women, not just those who regret becoming mothers. If we are disturbed by the idea that a woman might regret becoming a mother, Donath says, our response should not be to silence and shame these women; rather, we need to ask honest and difficult questions about how society pushes women into motherhood and why those who reconsider it are still seen as a danger to the status quo. Groundbreaking, thoughtful, and provocative, this is an especially needed book in our current political climate, as women's reproductive rights continue to be at the forefront of national debates.
A marriage-of-convenience spicy standalone romance from the New York Times bestselling author of Archer's Voice. Some vows are meant to be broken, but others are worth risking everything for...even your heart. Kira Dallaire is desperate. She must get married, and fast, to access the inheritance her late grandmother left her. Otherwise, she'll find herself at the mercy of her wealthy, abusive father. With little money and even fewer options, she uses her quick wit and impulsive heart to come up with a plan. Grayson Hawthorn is losing hope. A convicted felon with limited capital and dwindling resources, his vow to resurrect his family's struggling vineyard seems destined to fail. That is, until a young woman enters his office with an outlandish proposal—a win-win business marriage he can't refuse. But what begins as a temporary arrangement soon threatens to become more, as vibrant, spirited Kira challenges detached, arrogant Grayson to want more from life. To want more for himself. As their wills clash and fiery passion ignites, the two realize that sometimes the past creates walls too difficult to climb, and lies and deception rarely precede a happily ever after.
The Sears Baby Book, Revised Edition by James Sears,Robert W. Sears,William Sears,Martha Sears Pdf
America's bestselling "baby bible" -- an encyclopedic guide to the first two years of your baby's life. The million-copy bestseller by "the man who remade motherhood" (TIME) has now been revised, expanded, and bought thoroughly up-to-date -- with the latest information on everything from diapering to day care, from midwifery to hospital birthing rooms, from postpartum nutrition to infant development. The Searses draw from their vast experience both as medical professionals and pas parents to provide comprehensive information on virtually every aspect of infant care. The Baby Book focuses on the essential needs of babies -- eating, sleeping, develipment, health, and comfort -- as it addresses the questions of greatest concern to today's parents. The topics covered include: preparing for a safe and healthy birth bonding with your baby feeding your baby right soothing your fussy baby getting your baby to sleep understanding your baby's development treating common illnesses babyproofing your home understanding toddler behavior dealing with temper tantrums toilet training working parenting first-aid procedures and much more Unrivaled in its scope and authority, The Baby Book presents a practical, contemporary approach to parenting that reflects the way we live today. The Searses acknowledge that there is no one way to parent a baby, and they offer the basic guidance and inspiration you need to develop the parenting style that bests suits you and your child. Their book is a rich and invaluable resource that will help you get the most of of parenting -- for your child, yourself, and for your entire family.
When Stella Delray unexpectedly loses her job a week before Christmas, which is also the anniversary of her husband’s death, she is forced to stop talking to his ashes, come to terms with her loss, and get her life back on track for her young son’s sake as well as her own. She never expected that posting an ad on Craigslist would send her into the arms of not one but two men, one of whom is her former boss. Now she’s working as an admin for a retired Broadway star, bookkeeping for an erotic video production company, and writing love letters for the mysterious "Oaklander." Adding to the craziness of her new life, her monster-in-law resurfaces and the father-in-law she never met shows up on her doorstep. With the guidance of her best friend, Bono, Stella will learn to redefine the rules she’s always lived by.
What to Expect When You're No Longer Expecting When your baby dies, you find yourself in a life you never expected. And even though pregnancy and infant loss are common, they're not common to you. Instead, you feel like a stranger in your own body, surrounded by well-meaning people who often don't know how to support you. What you need during this time is not a book offering easy answers. You need a safe place to help you navigate what comes next, such as: · Coping with a postpartum body without a baby in your arms. · Facing social isolation and grief invalidation. · Wrestling with faith when you feel let down by God. · Dealing with the overwhelming process of making everyday decisions. · Learning to move forward after loss. · Creating a legacy for your child. In Unexpecting, bereaved mom Rachel Lewis is the friend you never knew you'd need, walking you through the unique grief of baby loss. When nothing about life after loss makes sense . . . this book will. "The guide that all parents experiencing pregnancy loss need when leaving the hospital grief-stricken, without a baby in their arms."--LINDSEY M. HENKE, founder of Pregnancy After Loss Support
