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How Speleology Restored My Sex Drive by Michael Bernhart Pdf
Some people can’t stay out of trouble. Happily married, the parents of two precocious nine-year old girls, and comfortably off, Max and Sally Brown should have it easy. Not yet; that’s where the little girls come in. The twins maneuver their parents into a dangerous treasure hunt through abandoned gold mines. As Max forewarns, “the closer you get to the treasure the more competitors show up, some of whom don’t play by the rules.” The competitors in this case are seven Klansmen who believe that the object of the treasure hunt, a large cache of Confederate gold, is theirs to finance a second rebellion. Set in northern Georgia, the couple combat bears, snakes, and the Klan to protect those they love. Their most cunning and committed adversaries, though, turn out to be their own children.
How Ornithology Saved My Life by Michael Bernhart Pdf
Smartass sociology professor Maxwell Smythe Brown IV thought he had it made. He had lots of money, a wonderful woman, Sally, and no responsibilities. There were, however, some loose ends left over from his earlier exploits – namely the four surviving and vicious outcasts of Indian Intelligence whom Max had beaten to the treasure of a Moghul Khan. Max had killed one assassin and Sally had killed the leader. But the bad guys just keep coming back. Set on a small island off the coast of Holland, this, the second installment chronicling Brown’s travails, finds him questioning his value and his values. Drawing on rusty skills, he tries to protect himself and those he loves from a determined and vengeful gang who torture and behead for sport.
How I Made $3,200,000 from My Hobby: Cutting to the Chase by Michael Bernhart Pdf
Maxwell Smythe Brown IV is a smart-ass by design. To counter the ridicule his fancy name attracted, Brown the child became the point person in pranks, taunts, and mischief that kept him in hot water with teachers, principals, clerics and coaches. As he grew older, he added irreverence to mischievousness and his circle of victims and antagonists expanded to include military commanders, bosses and colleagues. When his clever speech and picaresque ways help him win the hand of a stunningly beautiful woman, it goes wrong; she’s dismally unsuited for marriage and makes his life miserable. There are occasional bright spots: his disregard for authority and convention helps him survive the Vietnam war. But his inability to keep his mouth shut and his fly zipped costs him his university sinecure and he’s exiled to Dhaka, Bangladesh. Three hundred years earlier the great Moghul Khan Shaista abruptly abandoned his post in the same city. The Khan’s youngest and favorite daughter had succumbed to disease and the grief stricken Khan fled the country, but not – it is believed – before burying a treasure as a memorial to her short life.For three centuries fortune hunters have searched for the rumored treasure but Brown has an advantage. As an accessory to a pretentious name he’s taken on a pretentious hobby: collecting antiquarian maps. Initially unaware of the importance of the information on one of his old maps, Brown sets in motion events that bring him closer to the treasure, but also attract the competitive attention of six brutal castoffs of an Indian intelligence service. Before the dust settles, two men have been beheaded, another skinned, a bystander strangled and two more fatally shot. With wit and irreverence, the book chronicles the journey of a man whose outward self-assurance and brashness mask wavering self-regard. As Brown acknowledges, it’s a full time job keeping up appearances. But he’s not without depth. A continuing theme is his quest for the true nature of a compassionate God who, paradoxically, presides over a universe of undeniable evil.Throughout, Professor Brown is our acerbic guide to: an unholy war, college campuses in the 70’s, a university exhibiting signs of tenure-induced rigor mortis, a Thai brothel, the watering holes of Europe, and life in the bottom-most percentile of the third world. This edition (Cutting to the Chase) is an abridged version of the original book. Several readers said they would like to move more rapidly through the character development sections to the fast-paced thriller when Max takes up the treasure hunt in earnest (and the corpses stack up). Out of respect for that feedback, the novel was extensively revised to provide this – a more conventional – thriller.
Night Sweats: How Moral Philosophy Failed by Michael Bernhart Pdf
In this, the final volume in the Max Brown Tetralogy (+1), Sally and Max Brown encounter the inconveniences that accompany advancing age: declining health, concern over diminished appeal, a loss of optimism – and sometimes hope. These challenges pale, however, when they go in pursuit of the most ruthless and unprincipled criminals on earth: recruiters and surgeons who harvest and sell human organs. Set against the backdrop of honor crimes against women, Sally and Max fight to stay alive and protect the victims of honor crimes from further attack. The action takes place in Switzerland and Jordan. Sally, for the first time in the series, is a co-narrator.
How Existentialism Almost Killed Me by Michael Bernhart Pdf
Fourteen years after their (mis)adventures in the US Max and Sally are comfortably settled in Geneva and both wondering if their lives of comfort and privilege don’t require they make a contribution. They find token employment with the CIA. This converts to an assignment to uncover the source of counterfeit drugs in Southeast Asia that are killing thousands. Unprepared, and overly zealous, their every effort seems to result in the death of a friend or acquaintance. The trail leads to remnants of the Khmers Rouges – the quintessence of evil – in western Cambodia. The battle is waged on elephant back, in a Thai brothel, in Cambodian minefields, and in Khmers Rouges strongholds. Sally is wounded and Max is forced to carry on alone. Obsessed with the existence of evil since childhood, Max discovers an unwelcome source of barbarity: within himself
Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus by John Gray Pdf
Popular marriage counselor and seminar leader John Gray provides a unique, practical and proven way for men and women to communicate and relate better by acknowledging the differences between them. Once upon a time Martians and Venusians met, fell in love, and had happy relationships together because they respected and accepted their differences. Then they came to earth and amnesia set in: they forgot they were from different planets. Using this metaphor to illustrate the commonly occurring conflicts between men and women, Gray explains how these differences can come between the sexes and prohibit mutually fulfilling loving relationships. Based on years of successful counseling of couples, he gives advice on how to counteract these differences in communication styles, emotional needs and modes of behavior to promote a greater understanding between individual partners. Gray shows how men and women react differently in conversation and how their relationships are affected by male intimacy cycles ("get close", "back off"), and female self-esteem fluctuations ("I'm okay", "I'm not okay"). He encourages readers to accept the other gender's particular way of expressing love, and helps men and women learn how to fulfill each other's emotional needs. With practical suggestions on how to reduce conflict, crucial information on how to interpret a partner's behavior and methods for preventing emotional "trash from the past" from invading new relationships, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus is a valuable tool for couples who want to develop deeper and more satisfying relationships with their partners.
Magic Rising: An Elemental Witches Paranormal Romance by Elsa Jade Pdf
Enter a secret world hidden within our own, where elemental witches once wove the energies of Earth, Fire, Water, and Air into an ancient artifact of power that changed humanity. The Sundered Chalice was buried for a millennia, but it’s about to be found again… I’m Evalith Azarra—an Earth witch with broken magic. When I lost control of my magic, I was banished. Luckily, in Iceland no one minds a few earthquakes. But plagued by nightmares of an elemental apocalypse, I’m forced back to the West Coast alchemancers. My sister is in danger as she ascends to rule House Azarra—a place that would’ve been mine. I don’t belong there anymore, and with my Earth magic twisted by chaos, I bring more trouble than answers. Now I’m stuck with my sister’s bodyguard. He’s buff, badass—and a disbeliever, with no magical awareness…until me. I’m Van Asher—just a bodyguard who never had to believe in magic. The gold flecks in her eyes are too rich for my blood, and the fairy tales she tells too impossible to imagine. But when this barefoot witchy princess literally rocks my world, I have no chance: we’re bonded. Evalith claims she has no power, but she does…over me. Not a problem, since the explosions she triggers and bone-deep desire—also her fault—will probably kill me. Weirdly, there’s no place else I want to be, even if this bewitching Earth becomes my grave. We seek the Sundered Chalice—a long-lost elemental relic that might save our world…or unleash the shockwave that destroys it. Magic is rising, and whispers of upheaval threaten to unbalance House Azarra. We must unite the alchemancers once again. But our quest will compel us together too—too close, when every touch risks shattering the separation between magic and disbelief that’s protected both our worlds. And we’re not the only ones searching for the Sundered Chalice… *** MAGIC RISING is the first book in a new contemporary paranormal urban fantasy romance series from Elsa Jade (ExCap Files, Masters of the Flame, Big Sky Alien Brides) with three Gen Z witch sisters finding the right place—and love—for themselves while fighting to bring magic back to our everyday world. For fans of magic, action, adventure, plus kissing—and more! Happily ever afters, guaranteed.
To Love, Honor, and Vacuum by Sheila Wray Gregoire Pdf
"Sheila speaks to both the heart and habits of the woman who is wife and mother. The lessons in this book are biblical, doable, and affordable!"--Margaret B. Buchanan From advertisements to mommy blogs to Pinterest, scenes of domestic bliss abound, painting a picture of perfection and expectation nearly impossible to live up to. Why can't you work a full-time job, stylishly clothe yourself and your children, plan a party for twelve with handmade decorations, keep your house sparkling clean without chemicals, and bake a gourmet meal in the same day? Everyone else is doing it! For many women, housework has become more than chores that need to be done; it is a symbol of identity. Sheila Wray Gregoire wants to stop that thinking in its tracks and help women back to a life of balance--for their sakes and for their families. She encourages women to shift their focus from housekeeping to relationships and shows them how to foster responsibility and respect in all family members. The second edition retains the helpful, concrete advice on everyday situations such as strategies for tackling chores and budgets and tips on effective communication, while incorporating the wisdom Sheila has gained through her interaction with thousands of readers of her blog and through her speaking ministry over the past ten years. Through the principles in To Love, Honor, and Vacuum, Gregoire promises readers they can grow and thrive in the midst of their hectic lives--even if their circumstances stay the same.
Profanity, Obscenity and the Media by Melvin J. Lasky Pdf
This is the second volume of Melvin J. Lasky's The Language of Journalism series, praised as a "brilliant" and "original" study in communications and contemporary language, and as "a joy to read." When it was first published, it broke ground in focusing on the comparative styles and prejudices of mainstream American and British newspapers, and in its trenchant analysis of their systematic debasement of language in the face of obligatory platitudes and compulsory euphemisms. Lasky documents the growing crisis affecting honest, thoughtful, and independent journalism in the Western world. He extends the scope of his first volume in the trilogy and deepens the interpretation. He also adds a personal touch of wit and anecdote, as one might expect from an experienced international journalist and historian. Lasky's examination of the use of formerly forbidden language is a triumph of sinuous semantics. In his incisive analysis, we see the tortuous struggle of a once Puritanized literary culture writhing to break free of censorship and self-censorship. This volume on the phenomenon of profanity adds another dimension to Lasky's thesis on mass culture's trivialization of real social and political phenomena. It also underscores our society's embrace of banality, in standardizing politically correct jargon and slang. Readers of the first volume will find here a new range of references to illuminate the detail of what our newspapers have been publishing.
Nothing has exposed the gap between the church and the broader society quite like the volatile topics of sexuality, relationships, identities, orientations and even gender. With a pastor's heart and a missiologist's mind, Debra Hirsch helps us discover a holistic, biblical vision of sex and gender that honors God and offers good news to the world.
The bold and boundlessly original debut novel from the Oscar®-winning screenwriter of Being John Malkovich, Adaptation, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, and Synecdoche, New York. LONGLISTED FOR THE CENTER FOR FICTION FIRST NOVEL PRIZE • “A dyspeptic satire that owes much to Kurt Vonnegut and Thomas Pynchon . . . propelled by Kaufman’s deep imagination, considerable writing ability and bull’s-eye wit."—The Washington Post “An astonishing creation . . . riotously funny . . . an exceptionally good [book].”—The New York Times Book Review • “Kaufman is a master of language . . . a sight to behold.”—NPR NAMED ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR BY NPR AND MEN’S HEALTH B. Rosenberger Rosenberg, neurotic and underappreciated film critic (failed academic, filmmaker, paramour, shoe salesman who sleeps in a sock drawer), stumbles upon a hitherto unseen film made by an enigmatic outsider—a film he’s convinced will change his career trajectory and rock the world of cinema to its core. His hands on what is possibly the greatest movie ever made—a three-month-long stop-motion masterpiece that took its reclusive auteur ninety years to complete—B. knows that it is his mission to show it to the rest of humanity. The only problem: The film is destroyed, leaving him the sole witness to its inadvertently ephemeral genius. All that’s left of this work of art is a single frame from which B. must somehow attempt to recall the film that just might be the last great hope of civilization. Thus begins a mind-boggling journey through the hilarious nightmarescape of a psyche as lushly Kafkaesque as it is atrophied by the relentless spew of Twitter. Desperate to impose order on an increasingly nonsensical existence, trapped in a self-imposed prison of aspirational victimhood and degeneratively inclusive language, B. scrambles to re-create the lost masterwork while attempting to keep pace with an ever-fracturing culture of “likes” and arbitrary denunciations that are simultaneously his bête noire and his raison d’être. A searing indictment of the modern world, Antkind is a richly layered meditation on art, time, memory, identity, comedy, and the very nature of existence itself—the grain of truth at the heart of every joke.