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Love-centered Marriage in a Self-centered World by Irving Sarnoff,Suzanne Sarnoff Pdf
Considers how mates jointly create a setting for sharing love and defending against the fear of loving. The authors have integrated theory and practice in their description of six desirable objectives couples can plan to attain over a lifetime.
The Self-Centered Marriage by Hal Runkel, LMFT,Jenny Runkel Pdf
In the best-selling ScreamFree Parenting, Hal Runkel showed thousands of parents how focusing on themselves, in order to keep their cool, can revolutionize their family life. In his groundbreaking new book, The Self-Centered Marriage, Runkel now shows couples how learning to focus on themselves, in order to stay calm in the face of common marital conflicts, is the key to creating a deep, lifelong connection. Every committed couple strives to hold on to the marriage they envisioned back when they first said "I do"--before kids, mortgages, and all of life's inescapable issues seemed to get in the way. But the truth is this: conflict about these issues is unavoidable. What typically results are two spouses feeling forced to compromise themselves in order to just get along and keep it together. Eventually couples start "screaming" at each other--sometimes literally yelling out loud, sometimes shutting themselves down and shutting their partners out. In The Self-Centered Marriage, therapist and bestselling author Hal Runkel introduces some radical new concepts about marriage, teaching couples how to embrace their separate selves as a profound vehicle for strengthening a marriage. Every great marriage is a self-centered marriage because it's a bond between two whole, centered people. Calmly focusing on your own behavior, choices, and moods—which you can control—rather than your spouse’s—which you cannot—is the first step toward creating the relationship you really crave. Using accessible anecdotes and disarming humor, Runkel disproves prevailing marital wisdom and reveals a revolutionary path for spouses to be fully themselves, and fully married, at the same time.
Is trying to be “the best you” actually ruining you? From “living your best life” to “self-actualizing,” “finding your destiny,” and “waiting on the best to come,” the contemporary messages of the world exhort us to believe that we are promised and entitled the biggest and best life can possibly offer. But is that actually what Jesus promises? Is that even close to the message of the gospel? Getting Over Yourself is a call for Christians to reject these hollow messages of personal prosperity and to return to the humble truths of the gospel. You’ll learn how to identify this insidious, popular theology in culture and churches and examine its devastating effects. And, perhaps most importantly, you’ll learn how to combat it with gospel truth that leads to the abundant life Jesus actually desires for His people. Discover the beauty in losing yourself—and ultimately in gaining Him.
How to Raise Selfless Kids in a Self-Centered World by Dave Stone Pdf
Dave Stone shares creative ideas, real-life stories, and scriptural guidance about how to be a family that puts others first. In this third book from the Faithful Families series, How to Raise Selfless Kids in a Self-Centered World, Dave Stone continues to share his practical, conversational, and humorous approach to the challenges of building a strong spiritual foundation for the family. He equips parents with what they need to raise kids whose focus is not always on themselves. Some topics include: Becoming Others Focused, Service, Generosity, Forgiveness, and much more. Preaching is his gift, but Pastor Dave Stone’s family is his life’s blessing. And after raising three kids of his own, as well as shepherding the diverse families of his twenty-thousand-member congregation, his heart and passion for building strong families rings louder than ever. He knows that raising faithful families is a vital key to continued growth of the church.
Brad Hambrick examines Jesus teachings about broken relationships and shares strategies for interacting with a chronically self-centered spouse, bringing hope to victims of marital abuse and neglect.
Couple Resilience by Karen Skerrett,Karen Fergus Pdf
This distinctive volume expands our understanding of couple resilience by identifying and exploring specific mechanisms unique to intimate relationships that facilitate positive adaptation to life challenges. Committed partnerships represent a unique form of relational alliance that offers an opportunity and challenge to go beyond the self - to develop as individuals and as a relationship. The contributors to this volume represent a range of perspectives that integrate conventional relationship science and innovative empirical and theoretical work on the importance of meaning-making, narrative construction, intersubjectivity, forgiveness, and positive emotion in couple life. The volume also offers a unique anchor point - ‘We-ness’ as it relates to the intersection between shared, personal identity and well-being. Under-examined relational contexts such as resilience among LGBT partners and sexual resilience during illness adds further refinement of thought and application.
Positive Couple Therapy by Jefferson A. Singer,Karen Skerrett Pdf
Positive Couple Therapy: Using We-Stories to Enhance Resilience is a significant step forward in the couple literature. Utilizing a strengths-based approach, it teaches therapists and couples a unique method for uncovering positive potential within a relationship. The authors demonstrate how “We stories”–created, recovered and made anew–provide essential elements of connection. With vivid imagery, these stories capture the couple’s sense of “We-ness,” highlighting memorable moments of compassion, acceptance, and respect. A shared commitment to the “We” simultaneously builds the relationship and enables each individual in the partnership to feel a greater degree of both accountability and autonomy. Couples that can find their stories, share them with each other, and then carry them forward to family, friends, and a larger community are likely to preserve a sense of mutuality that will thrive over a lifetime of partnership. Positive Couple Therapy provides simple and practical instruction for reclaiming positive stories that can catalyze hope in relationships that have become stressed and strained. The authors weave together cutting edge thinking and research in attachment theory, narrative therapy, neuroscience, and adult development, as well as their own research and clinical experience to present vivid case histories, step-by-step strategies, exercises, questionnaires, and interview techniques. They cover a range of contemporary couple experiences: couples in conflict, LGBT partnerships, deployed and discharged military couples, and couples at various points across the life span. The authors’ unique Me (to US) Scale, a 10-item tool that assesses the degree of mutuality a couple possesses at the start of treatment, gives therapists of any theoretical orientation the ability to put this intervention to immediate use.
Intimate Creativity by Irving Sarnoff,Suzanne Sarnoff Pdf
Integrating the psychology of love and creativity, this pioneering book explores both how a couple’s involvement as lovers influences their creative collaboration and how working together affects their relationship. Representing a variety of genres—painting, sculpture, photography, and installation art—the celebrated couples profiled here include, among others, Christo and Jeanne-Claude, Elizabeth Diller and Ricardo Scofidio, and Kristin Jones and Andrew Ginzel. Intrigued by this process of "intimate creativity," psychologists Irving and Suzanne Sarnoff (themselves partners in love and work) decided to conduct in-depth interviews with partners in visual art because they defy the supremely individualistic tradition of their field. Whatever their age or sexual orientation, these artist-couples combine their talents to form a collective identity as a professional team. Passionately intense about their shared commitment, they communicate endlessly to resolve conflicts and reach consensus. Providing mutual validation and support, they increase their productivity and the quality of their work; they minimize their fear and frustration and enhance their pleasure in being together. The authors also draw on historical and contemporary literature about similar couples, ranging from Jean Arp and Sophie Taeuber to Gilbert and George to Claes Oldenburg and Coosje van Bruggen. Stimulating and engaging, this book highlights the features of a unique collaborative process, considers the connection between creativity and sexuality, and suggests possibilities for any couple to expand their intimacy.
Storying Later Life by Gary Kenyon,Ernst Bohlmeijer,William L. Randall Pdf
In its brief but vigorous history, gerontology has spawned a broadening range of specializations. One of the newest of such specializations is narrative gerontology, so named for its emphasis on the biographical, or inside, dimensions of the experience of aging. Telling stories about our world, our relationships, and ourselves is fundamental to how we make meaning. Everything from our history to our religion and our memories to our emotions is linked to the tales we tell ourselves, and others, about where we have come from and where we are going. They are central to who we are. The biographical side of human life is every bit as critical to fathom as the biological side, if we seek a more balanced, positive, and optimistic perspective on what aging is about; if we would honor the dignity and complexity, the humanity and uniqueness of the lives of older persons, no matter what their health or economic standing. In this respect, a narrative approach is particularly suited to the exploration of such topics as meaning, spirituality, and wisdom, and the connections they share. This volume reflects a selection of new directions and insights, and constitutes a general broadening and deepening of narrative gerontology, exploring its implications for theory and research in the field of aging, and for the quality of life of older adults themselves. Such deepening indicates a greater refinement of thought, method, and intervention. The evolution of narrative gerontology is also evidenced by a significant increase in the number of faculty and graduate students engaged in research in this area, as well as by increasing collaboration among researchers, practitioners, and administrators in applying narrative insights to contexts such as long term care - indeed, healthcare in general. These initiatives have given rise to the phrase, "narrative care as core care".
Our culture is self-obsessed – in our schedules, relationships, and especially online. (Can you say selfie?) But in this near-narcissism, people are less content than in decades past. Why? Because we forgot the joy that comes from putting others first. Doing so requires us to live alert, listening for “heart drops,” hints from those in our lives who need a helping hand or a generous dose of encouragement. Living alert lifts our own spirits, showing us that blessing others blesses us even more. Listen, Love, Repeat offers biblical teaching and suggests doable actions that are simple, heart-tugging, sentimental, even sneaky and hilarious. This message: • Presents scriptural examples of those who lived alert, including Jesus, who noticed those who least expected to be seen. • Explains the role of good works for followers of Christ. They aren’t our ticket to heaven but they are our marching orders on earth. • Gives creative ideas for showing love to friends and family, and suggests practical ways to reach out to the lonely, the marginalized, the outcast, and the odd duck. Additionally, it helps you comfort the grieving, showing what you can do when you don’t know what to say. • Provides inspiration for blessing the “necessary people” in your life, those often-overlooked souls who help you get life done every day, and teaches you how to hug a porcupine by genuinely loving the hard-to-love. As we scatter love, we create a safe space where we can openly share the gospel. We get to see lives changed right before our eyes. Most importantly, Listen, Love, Repeat will enable you to live a life that is full of kind deeds, not to selfishly shout, “Hey! Look at me!” but to humbly implore, “Will you look at Him?”
There is a mysterious connection between our experiences of intimacy--of love, the longing to feel connected, and sexual embrace--and the human sense of time--eternity, impermanence, and rhythm. In this critical analysis of the time-intimacy equation, Bennett shows how the scientific study of personal relationships can address this mystery. As a study of transpersonal science, this book points to the possible evolution of intimacy and of our consciousness of time, and how the two evolutionary paths weave together. Dr. Bennett draws from a wide array of resources to advance and marry two compelling themes: first, the social and clinical science of personal relationships should integrate the spiritual or transpersonal dimension of intimacy, and second, science can contribute to lay understandings by describing the richly temporal aspects of relationships. In blending popular literature, transpersonal psychology, and scientific research and theory, this work also attempts to address the lack of dialogue between academics who study personal intimacy and those writers in the popular press who give advice and guidelines for building intimacy. Time and Intimacy is written for a broad audience, intended for those with a general interest in relationships, as well as for students, counselors, and psychologists. It can be used as a text in courses on personal relationships, as well as to supplement courses in humanistic psychology, transpersonal psychology, interpersonal communication, relationships, marital and family counseling, human relations, and related areas. Because it advances an interdisciplinary understanding of personal relationships, this book is certain to challenge prevailing views about the meaning of intimacy in both the academic and popular literatures.
Realities and Relationships by Kenneth J. Gergen Pdf
Recent attempts to challenge the primacy of reason--and its realization in foundationalist accounts of knowledge and cognitive formulations of human action--have focused on processes of discourse. Drawing from social and literary accounts of discourse, Kenneth Gergen considers these challenges to empiricism under the banner of "social construction." His aim is to outline the major elements of a social constructionist perspective, to illustrate its potential, and to initiate debate on the future of constructionist pursuits in the human sciences generally and psychology in particular.
Waymond Rodgers, PhD, CPA, has worked over fifteen years studying how to combine ethical considerations with a decision-making model of perception, information, and judgment that will foster better decision-making processes, resulting in an overall improvement of daily life. He has presented seminars on ethics at numerous international conferences and also provided ethics presentations to corporations, societies, universities, and other organizations such as Opus Dei. The need for ethics in society is such an important factor because many commonly held ethical values are incorporated into laws. Yet, due to the judgmental nature of certain values, many ethical values of a society cannot be incorporated into law. Ethical process thinking involves discerning right from wrong and acting in alignment with such judgments, enabling us to complement several ethical approaches of preferences, rules, and principles with unique decision-making pathways leading to an ethical decision. Ethical decisions can be difficult to make due to a misunderstanding of the decision-making process, incomplete information, changing environments, time pressures, and a lack of expertise. Ethical Beginnings: Preferences, Rules, and Principles influencing decision making explains the major barriers to ethical decision-making, why structuring a problem is necessary, and when to use information for decision-making purposes.
Relational Responsibility by Sheila McNamee,Kenneth J. Gergen Pdf
The tradition of individual responsibility where individuals deliberate, morally evaluate, and then decide on a course of action is dear to the heart of Western ethical and legal codes and informs many contemporary practices of therapy, education, and organizational life. It also typically isolates, alienates, and ultimately invites the eradication of the otherùa step toward non-meaning. A vast range of current thinking places this view of the independently responsible individual in strong question. In Relational Responsibility, the authors attempt to transform the concept of responsibility in such a way that the relational process replaces the individual as the central concern. This volume invites practices that replace alienation and isolation with meaning-building dialogue. It is structured in a way that demonstrates their ideas. In Part I, McNamee and Gergen examine relational responsibility followed by their analysis of a challenging case study involving the issue of child sexual abuse. Part II contains responses from scholars and practitioners from the fields of communication, psychology, therapy, and organizational development that extend the original dialogue set out by McNamee and Gergen. Part III is a rejoinder to Part II in redirecting and augmenting the original conception and practice of relational responsibility. Relational Responsibility touches on a number of different disciplines, including communication theory, sociology, social theory, interpersonal and group communication, conflict management, and child abuse.
"Anyone in a marriage knows that we are all self-centered spouses who are married to self-centered spouses. But when this all-too-common sin becomes severe and chronic, it results in a marital environment of abuse or neglect---leaving the spouse on the receiving end feeling trapped and hopeless. But how might this outlook change if we knew that Jesus addressed just such chronically broken relationships? Brad Hambrick examines Jesus' teachings about relationships to show us how we can turn the other cheek while keeping away from unhealthy and destructive paths. He identifies different types of self-centered spouses to show us what we are dealing with, shares strategies for interacting with them, and points to evidences of genuine change to bring hope to anyone living with a chronically self-centered spouse.."--from publisher description.
