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The Trauma of Shame and the Making of the Self by Shelley Stokes,Sherron Lewis Pdf
Shame influences more of our thoughts and actions than many other emotions. Used as a punishment for bad behavior, shame acts as an incentive for us to behave in socially acceptable ways. As a common method used to regulate children's behavior, shame is by far one of the most pervasive socializing agents. Many of our more persistent, punitive, and critical feelings about ourselves stem from humiliations in early childhood even if we don't remember the specific events that prompted them. While we all experience shame from time to time, when shame becomes toxic, it can play a central role in our life-long development and functioning. At its worst, shame can become a devastating attack on one's personhood and a threat to the integrity of the self. Many books on shame and the process of healing have been written, but few have been written specifically from a psychodynamic depth psychology perspective. It is intended that The Trauma of Shame and The Making of the Self will make an important contribution to that effort. Shelley Stokes, PhD, and Sherron Lewis, LMFT Authors of Letting Go and Taking the Chance to be Real (Lewis and Stokes 2017)
Understanding and Treating Chronic Shame by Patricia A. DeYoung Pdf
Chronic shame is painful, corrosive, and elusive. It resists self-help and undermines even intensive psychoanalysis. Patricia A. DeYoung’s cutting-edge book gives chronic shame the serious attention it deserves, integrating new brain science with an inclusive tradition of relational psychotherapy. She looks behind the myriad symptoms of shame to its relational essence. As DeYoung describes how chronic shame is wired into the brain and developed in personality, she clarifies complex concepts and makes them available for everyday therapy practice. Grounded in clinical experience and alive with case examples, Understanding and Treating Chronic Shame is highly readable and immediately helpful. Patricia A. DeYoung’s clear, engaging writing helps readers recognize the presence of shame in the therapy room, think through its origins and effects in their clients’ lives, and decide how best to work with those clients. Therapists will find that Understanding and Treating Chronic Shame enhances the scope of their practice and efficacy with this client group, which comprises a large part of most therapy practices. Challenging, enlightening, and nourishing, this book belongs in the library of every shame-aware therapist.
Trauma, Shame, and Secret Making by Francis Joseph Harrington Pdf
Trauma, Shame, and Secret Making provides a descriptive, qualitative inquiry into a family’s unsuccessful attempts across generations to repress the memories of an early life trauma. Broad in its scope, Trauma, Shame, and Secret Making explores more than one hundred years in the life of a single family, offering students and professionals invaluable insight into the consequences of prolonged narrative suppression in the social life of people. The book models a converging interdisciplinary approach to inquiry across specializations spanning traumatology, family therapy, psychology, psychiatry and social work. The model is consistent with an evolving paradigm of medical, public health and social service practice based on biopsychosocial evaluation of all patients.
Shame, Pride, and Relational Trauma by Ken Benau Pdf
Shame, Pride, and Relational Trauma is a guide to recognizing the many ways shame and pride lie at the heart of psychotherapy with survivors of relational trauma. In these pages, readers learn how to differentiate shame and pride as emotional processes and traumatic mind/body states. They will also discover how understanding the psychodynamic and phenomenological relationships between shame, pride, and dissociation benefit psychotherapy with relational trauma. Next, readers are introduced to fifteen attitudes, principles, and concepts that guide this work from a transtheoretical perspective. Therapists will learn about ways to conceptualize and successfully navigate complex, patient-therapist shame dynamics, and apply neuroscientific findings to this challenging work. Finally, readers will discover how the concept and phenomena of pro-being pride, that is delighting in one's own and others' unique aliveness, helps patients transcend maladaptive shame and pride and experience greater unity within, with others, and with the world beyond.
A book for psychotherapists and their clients - and for anyone who wants to make the journey from shame to unshame. Carolyn Spring, author of 'Recovery is my best revenge: my experience of trauma, abuse and dissociative identity disorder', documents in this, her second book, her journey through psychotherapy to heal and resolve trauma-based shame, which had resulted in a catastrophic mental breakdown in her early thirties and an eventual diagnosis of dissociative identity disorder (DID). She then embarked on a nearly ten year journey of psychotherapy through which she came to realise that shame had actually saved her life. However, the cost to this protective function is a life lived dissociated from feelings of joy, connection, love and belonging. This book explores Carolyn's pathway towards 'Unshame'. Suitable for both professionals and survivors alike, it is a fascinating insight into that most private and mysterious of places - the therapy room, and the mind. About the author Carolyn Spring helps people recover from trauma and to reverse adversity. She is author of numerous books and articles and has delivered extensive training throughout the UK for both dissociative survivors and professionals working with them. She set up PODS (Positive Outcomes for Dissociative Survivors) in 2010 to promote recovery from dissociative disorders. She now works more widely in the field of mental health and adversity and combines a wealth of personal experience with research in her writing and training, bringing a rare positivity and the belief that no matter what people have experienced, recovery is possible. For more information go to www.carolynspring.com.
One of the most beloved and trusted mindfulness teachers in America offers a lifeline for difficult times: the RAIN meditation, which awakens our courage and heart Tara Brach is an in-the-trenches teacher whose work counters today's ever-increasing onslaught of news, conflict, demands, and anxieties--stresses that leave us rushing around on auto-pilot and cut off from the presence and creativity that give our lives meaning. In this heartfelt and deeply practical book, she offers an antidote: an easy-to-learn four-step meditation that quickly loosens the grip of difficult emotions and limiting beliefs. Each step in the meditation practice (Recognize, Allow, Investigate, Nurture) is brought to life by memorable stories shared by Tara and her students as they deal with feelings of overwhelm, loss, and self-aversion, with painful relationships, and past trauma--and as they discover step-by-step the sources of love, forgiveness, compassion, and deep wisdom alive within all of us.
Real-Self Expression Exploring the Dimensionalities of Who We Are From the Authors of Letting Go and Taking the Chance to be Real by Sherron Lewis Pdf
This book is about exploring the dimensionalities of who we are as we strive to communicate the deeper aspects of our being. Giving creative voice to "real-self expression" requires our establishing true communication with a deeper consciousness within us — a turning inward to capture and seize the thoughts, experiences, emotions, and myriad of memories that reside inside our mind — to push beyond the limitation of words and to stand in the spaces between what may seem to be inharmonious aspects of our self to find synchrony. This is the gift of our psychic symphony. The only question is one of what we will compose. Sherron Lewis and Shelley Stokes The authors, Shelley Stokes, Ph.D. and Sherron Lewis, LMFT, have been pursuing a conceptual, clinical and experiential exploration of the many dimensions and phenomena contained in the human struggles inherent in knowing, being, expressing and living as an expression of SELF that is more REAL and less a manifestation of distorting, inhibiting, fear inducing and submissiveness to accommodate to the perceived demands and expectations of external forces and emotionally important relationships. In this, their latest effort in this endeavor, they continue to employ a methodology that includes clinical theoretical formulations, neuropsychological findings, poetic and philosophical offerings, spiritual references, clinical therapeutic vignettes, and personal reflections. Throughout their writings, Lewis and Stokes, creatively share aspects of their own personal explorations and reflections on their journeys to greater self-authenticity and freedom of expressions of the self. In fact, it is through their use of personal self-disclosures, that they offer the reader a form of interpersonal experiential intimacy in teaching and encouraging the same in the reader's journey of self-discovering and expression, thus making accessible to the reader, especially the non-clinical professionals, a greater access to integrated knowing through concepts, emotions, reflections and experiences. Through this unique approach, the authors engage in a powerful means of communication by inviting the reader to personally engage in the demanding, complex, exciting, energizing and releasing effort to get beyond habitual ways of being in finding, creating and expressing that which has been waiting to be brought to greater fruition in REAL-SELF expression. Errol F. Leifer, PhD., ABPP ABN FABN Sherron Lewis is a licensed marriage and family therapist in private practice in Northern California. She specializes in individual and interpersonal conflict and personal development. Her theoretical orientation is a blend of psychodynamic, attachment, and family systems theories. She has enjoyed conducting many workshops on a variety of topics relating to parenting, shame, and real self-expression. The focal areas of her practice are: individual, couples, and family therapy, multilevel intervention, and clinical consultation. She also has enjoyed being a freelance artist for the past thirty-five years. Shelley Stokes is a clinical psychologist in private practice in Northern California. He received his certification in psychoanalytic psychotherapy from the Masterson Institute in 1994 and has had a long-standing practice treating adults and families. He has conducted many workshops and taught extensively on a variety of topics related to understanding and treating disorders of the self. In addition to coauthoring three recent books with Sherron, his other writings have included Disorders of the Self: Advances in Diagnosis and Treatment of Borderline Personality Organization, Non-Pathologic Object Use in the Process of Therapeutic Change: Winnicott Revisited, and The Culturally Different Patient in Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy.
Healing the Shame that Binds You by John Bradshaw Pdf
This classic book, written 17 years ago but still selling more than 13,000 copies every year, has been completely updated and expanded by the author. "I used to drink," writes John Bradshaw,"to solve the problems caused by drinking. The more I drank to relieve my shame-based loneliness and hurt, the more I felt ashamed." Shame is the motivator behind our toxic behaviors: the compulsion, co-dependency, addiction and drive to superachieve that breaks down the family and destroys personal lives. This book has helped millions identify their personal shame, understand the underlying reasons for it, address these root causes and release themselves from the shame that binds them to their past failures.
Shame is one of the most destructive of human emotions. If you suffered childhood physical or sexual abuse, you may experience such intense feelings of shame that it almost seems to define you as a person. In order to begin healing, it’s important for you to know that it wasn’t your fault. In this gentle guide, therapist and childhood abuse expert Beverly Engel presents a mindfulness and compassion-based therapeutic approach to help you overcome the debilitating shame that keeps you tied to the past. By following the step-by-step exercises in this book, you’ll gain a greater understanding of the root cause of your shame. And by cultivating compassion toward yourself, you will begin to heal and move past your painful experiences. Recent studies show that trauma survivors, particularly those with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) resulting from abuse, can greatly benefit from incorporating elements of self-compassion into their treatment. Furthermore, the practice of self-compassion has been shown to decrease PTSD symptoms, including, self-criticism, thought suppression, and rumination. This book is based on the author’s powerful and effective Compassion Cure program. With this book, you will develop the skills needed to finally put a stop the crippling self-blame that keeps you from moving on and being happy. You’ll learn to focus on your strengths, your courage, and your extraordinary ability to survive. Most of all, you’ll learn to replace shame with its counter emotion—pride.
I Don't Want to Talk About It by Terrence Real Pdf
A bestseller for over 20 years, I Don’t Want to Talk About It is a groundbreaking and hopeful guide to understanding and destigmatizing male depression, essential not only for men who may be suffering but for the people who love them. Twenty years of experience treating men and their families has convinced psychotherapist Terrence Real that depression is a silent epidemic in men—that men hide their condition from family, friends, and themselves to avoid the stigma of depression’s “un-manliness.” Problems that we think of as typically male—difficulty with intimacy, workaholism, alcoholism, abusive behavior, and rage—are really attempts to escape depression. And these escape attempts only hurt the people men love and pass their condition on to their children. This groundbreaking book is the “pathway out of darkness” that these men and their families seek. Real reveals how men can unearth their pain, heal themselves, restore relationships, and break the legacy of abuse. He mixes penetrating analysis with compelling tales of his patients and even his own experiences with depression as the son of a violent, depressed father and the father of two young sons.
Sit Down and Dialogue with Yourself by Shelley Stokes Ph.D. Pdf
Sit Down and Dialogue with Yourself: Understanding the Multiplicity of Our Self–States is about finding, listening to, and giving voice to the many internal voices that come from the varying self–states that comprise that vital, subjective core of authentic self–expression that is the center of that complex entity we call "me." Its basic premises are grounded in much of psychologist and psychoanalyst Philip Bromberg's writings on self–states, enactments, and dissociation, particularly as articulated in his books, Standing in the Spaces, Awakening the Dreamer, and The Shadow of the Tsunami. In this book we attempt to not only capture Dr. Bromberg's contributions in their foundations but also to take them into new directions that are uniquely our own in addressing what we believe to be centrally important psychological, motivational, emotional, and interpersonal processes involved in the development and practice of real–self expression as articulated by such psychoanalysts and writers as James Masterson. This is the third book in a trilogy that we have written together which explores the theme of becoming and expressing one's real self – the first being Letting Go and Taking the Chance to be Real and the second, The Trauma of Shame and the Making of the Self. In each of these books, many practical everyday examples, as well as clinical vignettes, are provided for both the general reader and the seasoned professional.
Guilt, Shame, and Anxiety by Peter R. Breggin, MD Pdf
With the first unified theory of guilt, shame, and anxiety, this pioneering psychiatrist and critic of psychiatric diagnoses and drugs examines the causes and effects of psychological and emotional suffering from the perspective of biological evolution, child development, and mature adult decision-making. Drawing on evolution, neuroscience, and decades of clinical experience, Dr. Breggin analyzes what he calls our negative legacy emotions—the painful emotional heritage that encumbers all human beings. The author marshals evidence that we evolved as the most violent and yet most empathic creatures on Earth. Evolution dealt with this species-threatening conflict between our violence and our close-knit social life by building guilt, shame, and anxiety into our genes. These inhibiting emotions were needed prehistorically to control our self-assertiveness and aggression within intimate family and clan relationships. Dr. Breggin shows how guilt, shame, and anxiety eventually became self-defeating and demoralizing legacies from our primitive past that no longer play any useful or positive role in mature adult life. He then guides the reader through the Three Steps to Emotional Freedom, starting with how to identify negative legacy emotions and then how to reject their control over us. Finally, he describes how to triumph over and transcend guilt, shame, and anxiety on the way to greater emotional freedom and a more rational, loving, and productive life.