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Daughters, Dads, and the Path Through Grief by Donna DiCello, Psy.D.,Lorraine Mangione, Ph.D. Pdf
Losing a father can be absolutely wrenching. This insightful guide tells the story of the strong connections between daughters and dads throughout life, and the consequential grief and loss a daughter feels when her father dies. Stories from 50 women offer glimpses into the many aspects of father/daughter relationships that are warm and nurturing, sometimes complicated and conflicted, and always solid and enduring. The Italian American women interviewed ultimately find great peace and meaning in the on-going relationship with their fathers, even after death. Using these women’s stories, the readers are presented a multi-faceted discussion filled with amusement, complexity and intensity, struggle and resistance, and above all, remarkably powerful family bonds. The daughters’ reactions to the passing of their fathers display the strength of relationships built over many years, as well as the spiritual and emotional framework that shapes the lives of many Italian American women today.
Dead Dads Club is a moving collection of stories from women who have lost their fathers. A bittersweet journey through the experience of parental loss, from the 4:00am phone call we all dread receiving, to the agony of watching our loved one wither from disease, these raw stories capture the essence of grief, and reflect on the precious moments shared between daughters and their dads. With a deft balance of sensitivity and humor, Dead Dads Club gets to the heart of bereavement and offers hope for any daughter mourning the loss of her father.
A moving, elegantly written, and exhaustively researched account of what it means for a girl to lose a father to death or divorce—with advice for fatherless daughters on how to cope. “People who lose their parents early in life are like fellow war veterans. As soon as they discover that they are talking to someone else who has lost a parent, they know they are speaking the same language without uttering a word.” Pamela Thomas gives voice to this unspoken pain in Fatherless Daughters. Still haunted by her own father’s death when she was ten, Thomas decided to explore its effects. Though her journey began as a personal one, she soon felt the need to hear from other women and ended up interviewing more than one hundred fatherless women. They ranged in age from nineteen to ninety-four; they came from all areas of the country as well as Europe and Asia; some had lost their fathers to death, others to divorce or abandonment. Each account was unique, but the impact of a father’s loss was profound in every woman’s life. Thomas begins by defining what it means to be a father in our world. She discusses the initial shock of his loss, exploring the aspects that color how a young girl experiences it: her age at the time of her father’s death or abandonment, her mother’s behavior and attitudes, her place in the family vis-à-vis siblings, and the influence of a stepfather or father-surrogates. Thomas shows how a father’s early death or abandonment affects a woman’s emotional health and self-esteem, her body image, her sexual experiences, her marriage, her family life, and her career. Perhaps most important, Thomas offers compassionate advice for coming to terms with father loss, even late in life, from actively mourning, to healing, to starting fresh.
Grieving Dads: To the Brink and Back is a collection of candid stories from grieving dads that were interviewed over a two year period. The book offers insight from fellow members of, in the haunting words of one dad, "this terrible, terrible club," which consists of men who have experienced the death of a child. This book is a collection of survival stories by men who have survived the worst possible loss and lived to tell the tale. They are real stories that pull no punches and are told with brutal honesty. Men that have shared their deepest and darkest moments. Moments that included thoughts of suicide, self-medication and homelessness. Some of these men have found their way back from the brink while others are still standing there, stuck in their pain. The core message of Grieving Dads is "you're not alone." It is a message that desperately needs to be delivered to grieving dads who often grieve in silence due to society's expectations. Grieving Dads: To the Brink and Back is a book that no grieving dad or anyone who cares for him should be without. As any grieving parent will tell you, there are no words to describe the hell one experiences after the death of a child. Many men have no clue how to deal with or understand the myriad emotional, mental, and physical responses experienced after the death of a child. Stories appearing in the book have been carefully selected to represent a cross-section of fathers, as well as a diverse portrayal of loss. This approach helps reflect the full spectrum of grief, from the early days of shock and trauma to the long view after living with loss for many years. Any bereaved father will find brotherhood in these pages, and will feel that someone understands them. While there is plenty of raw emotion in this book-the stories are not exercises in self-pity nor are they studies in grief. They are survival stories instead. Some are testimonies to hope. Some are gut-wrenching accounts of overwhelming despair. But all of them are real-life stories from real-life grieving dads, and they show that even if one reaches his physical and emotional bottom, it is possible (although not easy) to live through that pain and find one's way to the other side of grief. Most dads in this book found themselves in a state of physical, mental, and emotional collapse after the death of their child. As if the losses alone weren't enough to drive these men to the brink, most try to deal with their grief according to the conventional wisdom so many men are brought up with, which perversely, increases their suffering all the more. We all know the party line about how men are "supposed" to deal with loss or even disappointment: toughen up, get back to work, take it like a man, support your wife, don't talk about your emotions, don't lose control, and if you must cry-by all means do so in private.
Without proper support, navigating the icy waters of grief may feel impossible. The grieving person may feel spiritually bankrupt and often the loss is so painful that the bereaved may lose faith in what they once held dear. Mindfulness meditation can restore hope by offering a compassionate safe haven for healing and self-reflection. While nobody can predict the path of someone else's grief, this book will guide the reader forward through the grieving process with simple mindfulness-based exercises to restore mind, body and spirit. These easy-to-follow meditations will help the reader to cope with the pain of loss, and embark on a healing journey. Each chapter focuses on a different aspect of grief, and the guided meditations will calm the mind and increase clarity and focus. Mindfulness and Grief will help readers to begin the process of reconstructing the shattered self that is left in the wake of any major loss.
"Elegant prose ... sheds new light on the father-daughter dynamic" -Boston magazine Praise for Fatherless WOMEN "If it can be said about a book on loss, Fatherless Women is a pleasure to read. Clea Simon is a warm, honest, intelligent, and trustworthy guide, not only for grieving women but for the men who support them. Simon's insights about father-daughter relationships are profound." -Neil Chethik, author of FatherLoss "Clea Simon deepens our understanding of the complicated emotions daughters feel about fathers, both during life and especially after death. This book will help heal rifts and set stuck energies free." -Beth Witrogen McLeod, author of Caregiving: The Spiritual Journey of Love, Loss, and Renewal "Unusually candid and often provocative . . . Simon's book is immensely thought-provoking about a topic that all of us will face." -Pauline Boss, Ph.D., author of Ambiguous Loss: Learning to Live with Unresolved Grief There is a special bond between a father and a daughter, and when that bond is broken by death, a woman's life can change in profound and unexpected ways. Clea Simon, critically acclaimed author of Mad House, explores this crucial meeting point of grief and growth by delving into her own experience and those of other women to paint an illuminating portrait of the father-daughter relationship and its lifelong ramifications. Filled with moving stories of real women, this poignant, comforting, and insightful book paves the way for all women to make peace with the past, with the adults they have become, and to courageously face the question: what happens next?
Grieving the Death of a Father by Harold Ivan Smith Pdf
Losing a father can be a complex and confusing transition. Grief counselor and educator Harold Ivan Smith compassionately guides readers through their grief, from the process of dying through the acts of remembering and honoring a father after his death.
“The strong, authentic voices of the women sharing their own narratives and awakenings from life without fathers is the power of this book.” —Esme AAMBC Non-Fiction Self-Help Book of the Year AAMBC Breakout Author of the Year He Never Came Home is a collection of twenty-two personal essays written by girls and women who have been separated from their fathers by way of divorce, abandonment, or death. The contributors to this collection come from a wide range of different backgrounds in terms of race, socioeconomic status, religion, and geographic location. Their essays offer deep insights into the emotions related to losing one’s father, including sadness, indifference, anger, acceptance—and everything in between. This book, edited by Essence magazine’s west coast editor Regina R. Robertson, is first and foremost an offering to young girls and women who have endured the loss of their fathers. But it also speaks to mothers who are raising girls without a father present, offering important perspective into their daughter’s feelings and struggles. The essays in He Never Came Home are organized into three categories: “Divorce,” “Distant,” and “Deceased.” With essays by contributors including Emmy Award-winning actress Regina King, fitness expert and New York Times bestselling author Gabrielle Reece, television comedy writer Jenny Lee—and a foreword by TV news anchor Joy-Ann Reid—this anthology illustrates the journey of the fatherless, and provides a space for these writers to express their pain, hope, and healing, minus any judgments and without apology.
The Fatherless Daughter Project by Denna Babul RN,Karin Luise Pdf
“This groundbreaking work will give voice to an enormous population of women who are struggling to understand themselves in the face of their fathers’ absence.” —Claire Bidwell Smith, author of The Rules of Inheritance and After This When Motherless Daughters was published 20 years ago, it unleashed a tsunami of healing awareness. When Denna Babul and Karin Smithson couldn't find the equivalent book for fatherlessness, The Fatherless Daughter Project was born. The book will set fatherless women on the path to growth and fulfillment by helping them to understand how their loss has impacted their lives. A father is supposed to provide a sense of security and stability. Losing a father comes with particular costs that vary depending on the way he left and how old a girl was when she lost him. Drawing on interviews with over 5000 women who became fatherless due to death, divorce, neglect, and outright abandonment, the authors have found that fatherless daughters tend to push their emotions underground. These issues in turn become distinct patterns in their relationships as adult women and they often can't figure out why. Delivered with compassion and expertise, this book allows readers support and understanding they never had when they first needed it, and it encourages the conversation to continue.
Examines the long-term ramifications for adult women who, as adolescent girls, lost their fathers to death, divorce, or addiction; helps them understand how their behaviors were shaped by that loss at a pivotal developmental stage; and provides some interactive exercises to help them heal. Original.
Based on a national survey of 300 men, and in-depth interviews with 70 others, this landmark book focuses specifically on how sons cope with the deaths of their fathers, offering a fresh insight into the unique male grieving process.
Daughters Who Walk This Path by Yejide Kilanko Pdf
Daughters Who Walk This Path depicts the dramatic coming of age of Morayo, a spirited and intelligent girl growing up in 1980s Ibadan who is thrust into a web of oppressive silence woven by the adults around her. It's a legacy of silence many women in Morayo's family share. Only Aunty Morenike-once protected by her own mother-provides Morayo with a safe home, and a sense of female community which sustains Morayo as she grows into a young woman in bustling, politically charged, often violent Nigeria.
Too Much Loss: Coping with Grief Overload by Alan Wolfelt Pdf
Grief overload is what you feel when you experience too many significant losses all at once, in a relatively short period of time, or cumulatively. In addition to the deaths of loved ones, such losses can also include divorce, estrangement, illness, relocation, job changes, and more. Our minds and hearts have enough trouble coping with a single loss, so when the losses pile up, the grief often seems especially chaotic and defeating. The good news is that through intentional, active mourning, you can and will find your way back to hope and healing. This compassionate guide will show you how.
As Elyce Wakerman found in the scores of interviews she conducted, the loss of a father— through death, divorce, or abandonment—is the event that shapes a girl’s life and all her future relationships. “In my fantasy,” one woman commented, “he remains the perfect, all-giving man”—a difficult role for any other man to fill. Based partly on the author’s experience, partly on her in-depth interviews, and partly on a questionnaire she developed with psychologist Holly Barrett to which almost six hundred women responded, Father Loss provides the clearest portrait yet of a very special group of women. As a group, they express their insecurities (“Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever be able to love a man totally . . . because that would mean I didn’t love my father anymore.” —Leslie). Yet individually, many have become outstanding achievers, including Eleanor Roosevelt (“He dominated my life as long as he lived and was the love of my life for years after he died.”), Helen Gurney Brown (“People in business, my bosses, I look to them all as fathers.”), Barbara Streisand, Gloria Steinem, Geraldine Ferraro and many others. A bestseller when it was first published twenty-five years ago and now updated and revised, Father Loss gives information and insight to fatherless daughters, to widows and divorcees with daughters, and to every father who needs to understand the vital role he plays in his daughter’s life—as the first man she ever loves.
One of the biggest lessons I learned from being a grieving dads is that we must get comfortable with telling our story. Get comfortable being uncomfortable. That means facing the things that we tucked away in those dark corners of our being. Things we witnessed, emotions we felt or thoughts we have had after the death of our child.Knowing my own needs and hearing from others has inspired me to create additional resources for grieving dads that have to navigate through the aftermath of burying a child. One of those resources is this workbook.Some of you will feel uncomfortable attending a support group, I was. Therefore, the workbook was developed so it can be used on an individual basis or in a support group setting. The workbook follows the same outline and was designed to be a tool that helps the reader process key points highlighted in my original book, Grieving Dads: To the Brink and Back.The workbook will be tough at times, so know that going in. You will have to dig deep, learn to be transparent and surrender. Tell your story, your whole story.I am very happy that you found this workbook and are willing to give it a try. There is no judgement in what you have to say. Anyone that has had to walk this path understands that to be the truth. We are all just trying to get through it the best we can. My hope is that this workbook will help you get to the next level of healing.