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"What do you do when you're sick of hearing about failed heroics and fearful of being eaten by your cannibalistic village mates? Flee to the Highlands in search of paradise, of course! However, for Drin, the hapless anti-hero, paradise is quickly found and then lost, pitching him headlosng into an outlandish adventure where every turn propels him closer to an inevitable and unwanted encounter with Ka, the tyrannical Dragon Princess"--Back cover of print version.
Fern Majestic and the Fall of a Dragon by James Stevens Pdf
Fern Majestic leads a solitary life as a blacksmith in the small village of Burdensville in the Kingdom of Loustof. His solitude, however, is not by choice. The name Majestic has been declared Traitor by the ruler of Loustof, King Edinword. Unbeknownst to Fern, his life will forever change on an early spring morning.
The Incredible Adventures of Professor Branestawm by Norman Hunter Pdf
Rediscover Professor Branestawm this Christmas – soon to become a brand new drama on BBC ONE written by Charlie Higson and starring Harry Hill ‘Once you started anything in Professor Branestawm’s house you never knew when it might finish or even if it ever would’ Poor Mrs Flittersnoop! It’s not easy being Professor Branestawm’s housekeeper. People may say he’s a genius, but all his inventions always make life more complicated, alarming and extraordinary than it was before. An innocent bottle of old cough mixture turns out to be an elixir that makes all the waste paper in the bin come to life, the burglar-catcher and the pancake-maker operate just a little too efficiently, and about the spring-cleaning machine, the less said the better. You could write a book about it, but nobody would believe it. Includes exclusive material: In the Backstory you can find out about accidental inventions that changed our lives and try a few experiments of your own! Vintage Children’s Classics is a twenty-first century classics list aimed at 8-12 year olds and the adults in their lives. Discover timeless favourites from The Jungle Book and Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland to modern classics such as The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas and The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time.
An 'After-the-Bomb' story told by teenage Danny, one of the survivors - one of the unlucky ones. Set in Shipley, an ordinary town in the north of England, this is a powerful portrayal of a world that has broken down. Danny not only has to cope in a world of lawlessness and gang warfare, but he has to protect and look after his little brother, Ben, and a girl called Kim. Is there any hope left for a new world?
He's madly sane and cleverly dotty. Professor Branestawm is the craziest genius you'll ever meet and he's back with this bumper collection of hilarious adventures, zany inventions and mind-boggling experiments. So open up for a wacky collection of stories, riddles, puzzles, tricks and tips . . . You'll never get the better of Professor Branestawn but now you can at least get the best!
Welcome to Overland! Where the California sun shines down on synthetic grass and plastic oranges bedeck the trees all year round. Steam billows gently from the chimney tops and the blue tarpaulin lake is open for fishing... Hollywood set-designer George Godfrey has been called on to do his patriotic duty and he doesn’t believe in half-measures. If he is going to hide an American aircraft plant from the threat of Japanese aerial spies he has an almighty job on his hands. He will need an army of props and actors to make the Lockheed factory vanish behind the semblance of a suburban town. Every day, his “Residents” climb through a trapdoor in the factory roof to shift model cars, shop for imaginary groceries and rotate fake sheep in felt-green meadows. Overland is a beacon for the young women labouring below it: Queenie, dreaming of movie stardom while welding sheet metal; Kay, who must seek refuge from the order to intern “All Persons of Japanese Ancestry”. Meanwhile, George’s right-hand Resident, Jimmy, knows that High Command aren’t at all happy with the camouflage project... With George so bewitched by his own illusion, might it risk confusing everybody – not just the enemy? Overland is a book like no other -- to be read in landscape format. Based on true events, it is a novel where characters' dreams and desires come down to earth with more than a bump, confronting the hardships of life during wartime. As surreal and playful as it is affecting and unsettling, no-one other than Graham Rawle could have created it.
When Miss Hazelstone of Jacaranda Park kills her Zulu cook in a sensational crime passionel, the gallant members of the South African police force are soon on the scene: Kommandant van Heerden, whose secret longing for the heart of an English gentleman leads to the most memorable transplant operation yet recorded; Luitenant Verkramp of the Security Branch, ever active in the pursuit of Communist cells; Konstabel Els, with his propensity for shooting first and not thinking later - and also for forcing himself upon African women in a manner legally reserved for male members of their own race. In the course of the strange events which follow, we encounter some very esoteric perversions when the Kommandant is held captive in Miss Hazelstone's remarkable rubber room; and some even more amazing perversions of justice when Miss Hazelstone's brother, the Bishop of Barotseland, is sentenced to be hanged on the ancient gallows in the local prison. Not a 'political' novel in any previously imagined sense, Riotous Assembly provided a completely fresh approach to the South African scene - an approach startling in its deadpan savagery and yet also outrageously funny.
In Piemburgem, the deceptively peaceful-looking capital of Zululand, Kommandant van Heerden, Konstabel Els and Luitenant Verkramp continue to terrorise true Englishman and even truer Zulus in their relentless search for a perfect South Africa. Kommandant van Heerden, that great Anglophile, gropes his way towards attaining true 'Englishness' in the company of the eccentric Dornford Yates Club. But Luitenant Verkramp, whose hatred of all things English is surpassed only by his fear of sex, sets in motion an experiment in mass chastity (with the help of a lady psychiatrist), which has remarkable and quite unforeseen results.
Kept in a bird-coop by his parents, Sunny McCreary endured a childhood of neglect, abuse and being bullied by pigeons, only to find it was all downhill from there. In the course of the most painful life ever, he survived tragedy and maiming, a savage convent school education, being pimped out in pink-satin hot pants, a degrading addiction to helium, and having a baboon's arse grafted onto his face. Then things got really bad. More horrible than A Child Called It, more heartrending than Ugly, more repulsive than the Alastair Campbell diaries, My Godawful Life is the misery memoir to end all misery memoirs and the feel-bad book of the year.
The Reluctant Vampire (The Reluctant Vampire, Book 1) by Eric Morecambe Pdf
A shocking announcement from the Vampire Prince - that he doesn't like blood but prefers chips and a glass of red wine - begins a tale of ghoulish intrigue and hilarious horror. With illustrations by Tony Ross, this re-issue is sure to delight.