The Velvet Rage

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The Velvet Rage

Author : Alan Downs
Publisher : Da Capo Lifelong Books
Page : 224 pages
File Size : 48,6 Mb
Release : 2006-04-25
Category : Psychology
ISBN : 0738210617

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The Velvet Rage by Alan Downs Pdf

The gay male world today is characterized by seductive beauty, artful creativity, flamboyant sexuality, and, encouragingly, unprecedented acceptability in society. Yet despite the progress of the recent past, gay men still find themselves asking, "Are we really better off?" The inevitable byproduct of growing up gay in a straight world continues to be the internalization of shame, a shame gay men may strive to obscure with a fa?ade of beauty, creativity, or material success. Drawing on contemporary psychological research, the author's own journey to be free of anger and of shame, as well as the stories of many of his friends and clients, The Velvet Rage outlines the three distinct stages to emotional well-being for gay men. Offering profoundly beneficial strategies to stop the insidious cycle of avoidance and self-defeating behavior, The Velvet Rage is an empowering book that will influence the public discourse on gay culture, and positively change the lives of gay men who read it.

The Velvet Rage

Author : Alan Downs
Publisher : Da Capo Lifelong Books
Page : 274 pages
File Size : 55,5 Mb
Release : 2012-06-05
Category : Social Science
ISBN : 9780738215853

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The Velvet Rage by Alan Downs Pdf

This groundbreaking and empowering book examines the impact of growing up and surviving as a gay man in a society still learning to accept all identities. In The Velvet Rage, psychologist Alan Downs draws on his own struggle with shame and anger, contemporary research, and stories from his patients to passionately describe the stages of a gay man's journey out of shame and offers practical and inspired strategies to stop the cycle of avoidance and self-defeating behavior. The Velvet Rage is an empowering book that has already changed the public discourse on gay culture and helped shape the identity of an entire generation of gay men.

Out of the Shadows

Author : Walt Odets
Publisher : Farrar, Straus and Giroux
Page : 368 pages
File Size : 51,6 Mb
Release : 2019-06-04
Category : Social Science
ISBN : 9780374719326

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Out of the Shadows by Walt Odets Pdf

A moving exploration of how gay men construct their identities, fight to be themselves, and live authentically It goes without saying that even today, it’s not easy to be gay in America. While young gay men often come out more readily, even those from the most progressive of backgrounds still struggle with the legacy of early-life stigma and a deficit of self-acceptance, which can fuel doubt, regret, and, at worst, self-loathing. And this is to say nothing of the ongoing trauma wrought by AIDS, which is all too often relegated to history. Drawing on his work as a clinical psychologist during and in the aftermath of the epidemic, Walt Odets reflects on what it means to survive and figure out a way to live in a new, uncompromising future, both for the men who endured the upheaval of those years and for the younger men who have come of age since then, at a time when an HIV epidemic is still ravaging the gay community, especially among the most marginalized. Through moving stories—of friends and patients, and his own—Odets considers how experiences early in life launch men on trajectories aimed at futures that are not authentically theirs. He writes to help reconstruct how we think about gay life by considering everything from the misleading idea of “the homosexual,” to the diversity and richness of gay relationships, to the historical role of stigma and shame and the significance of youth and of aging. Crawling out from under the trauma of destructive early-life experience and the two epidemics, and into a century of shifting social values, provides an opportunity to explore possibilities rather than live with limitations imposed by others. Though it is drawn from decades of private practice, activism, and life in the gay community, Odets’s work achieves remarkable universality. At its core, Out of the Shadows is driven by his belief that it is time that we act based on who we are and not who others are or who they would want us to be. We—particularly the young—must construct our own paths through life. Out of the Shadows is a necessary, impassioned argument for how and why we must all take hold of our futures.

Straight Jacket

Author : Matthew Todd
Publisher : Black Swan
Page : 0 pages
File Size : 49,7 Mb
Release : 2018
Category : Gay men
ISBN : 0552778400

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Straight Jacket by Matthew Todd Pdf

Written by Matthew Todd, editor of Attitude, the UK's best-selling gay magazine, Straight Jacket is a revolutionary clarion call for gay men, the wider LGBT community, their friends and family. Part memoir, part ground-breaking polemic, it looks beneath the shiny facade of contemporary gay culture and asks if gay people are as happy as they could be - and if not, why not? In an attempt to find the answers to this and many other difficult questions, Matthew Todd explores why statistics show a disproportionate number of gay people suffer from mental health problems, including anxiety, depression, addiction, suicidal thoughts and behaviour, and why significant numbers experience difficulty in sustaining meaningful relationships.

Faggots

Author : Larry Kramer
Publisher : Grove Press
Page : 390 pages
File Size : 53,7 Mb
Release : 2000
Category : Fiction
ISBN : 0802136915

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Faggots by Larry Kramer Pdf

Thirty-nine-year-old Fred Lemish had always hoped that love would find him by the age of forty, and with four days to go, he begins a compulsive, yet humorous, search for that love and commitment, in a classic novel of gay life. Reprint.

10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do to Improve Their Lives

Author : Joe Kort
Publisher : ReadHowYouWant.com
Page : 322 pages
File Size : 51,6 Mb
Release : 2010-11-26
Category : Social Science
ISBN : 9781459608429

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10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do to Improve Their Lives by Joe Kort Pdf

Openly gay therapist Joe Kort provides 10 powerful and positive steps gay men can take to isolate and overcome self-defeating behavior patterns, and move in healthier and more rewarding directions: Take Charge of Their Own Lives Affirm Themselves by Coming Out Resolve Differences With Parents and Relatives 'Graduate' From Delayed Adolescence Avoid - or Overcome - Sexual Addiction -Learn from Successful Mentors Whove Been There, Done That Take Advantage of 'Therapy Workouts' Achieve - and Maintain - Rewarding Relationships Understand the Stages of Loves Commit to Their Partner.These solid and reliable 'Top 10' life steps that have been most helpful to Joe Korts clients in his 16 years of working with hundreds of gay men, are presented in an engaging and easy-to-understand manner and are supplemented by case histories from his practice. These are time-tested, practical decisions gay men can make in their search for emotional, sexual and personal fulfillment

Good As You

Author : Paul Flynn
Publisher : Random House
Page : 368 pages
File Size : 44,8 Mb
Release : 2017-04-27
Category : Social Science
ISBN : 9781473529175

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Good As You by Paul Flynn Pdf

‘One of the most important books about gay culture in recent times’ The Quietus Long-listed for the Polari First Book Prize In 1984 the pulsing electronics and soft vocals of Smalltown Boy would become an anthem uniting gay men. A month later, an aggressive virus, HIV, would be identified and a climate of panic and fear would spread across the nation, marginalising an already ostracised community. Yet, out of this terror would come tenderness and 30 years later, the long road to gay equality would climax with the passing of same sex marriage. Paul Flynn charts this astonishing pop cultural and societal U-turn via the cultural milestones that effected change—from Manchester’s self-selection as Britain’s gay capital to the real-time romance of Elton John and David Furnish’s eventual marriage. Including candid interviews from major protagonists, such as Kylie, Russell T Davies, Will Young, Holly Johnson and Lord Chris Smith, as well as the relative unknowns crucial to the gay community, we see how an unlikely group of bedfellows fought for equality both front of stage and in the wings. This is the story of Britain’s brothers, cousins and sons. Sometimes it is the story of their fathers and husbands. It is one of public outrage and personal loss, the (not always legal) highs and the desperate lows, and the final collective victory as gay men were final recognised, as Good As You.

Coming Out of Shame

Author : Gershon Kaufman, Ph.D.,Lev Raphael, Ph.D.
Publisher : Main Street Books
Page : 0 pages
File Size : 42,7 Mb
Release : 1996-12-01
Category : Social Science
ISBN : 0385477961

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Coming Out of Shame by Gershon Kaufman, Ph.D.,Lev Raphael, Ph.D. Pdf

Most gay men and lesbians grow up learning that to be gay is to be sick, to be unnatural, to be a sinner. By adolescence, such negative attitudes have produced and reinforced a single, powerful emotion: shame, the feeling that you’re inferior and judged as “bad,” for what you are—gay. In Coming out of Shame Gershen Kaufman and Lev Raphael expose the role shame has come to play in gay and lesbian lives. Rarely discussed but vastly important, shame powerfully shapes each individual’s development of self-esteem, identity, and intimacy—three areas in which gay men and lesbians have been extremely vulnerable to the crippling effects of shame. Tracing the historical and cultural sources of gay shame, Kaufman and Raphael reveal how gay men and lesbians have internalized shame, resulting in self-loathing and destructive behaviors. The hallmark of shame is silence, and by breaking the silence around the dynamics of gay shame, Kaufman and Raphael offer a way to “come out” of shame and begin the journey toward wholeness and self-acceptance. Filled with the experiences of those struggling to overcome shame, Coming Out of Shame includes strategies for: • Storing self-esteem • Creating a positive gay identity • Healing scenes of shame • Developing partnerships in intimacy Self-affirming and inspirational, Coming Out of Shame guides the transformation of gay shame into gay pride and empowers gay men and lesbians as no other book has done.

Why Are Faggots So Afraid of Faggots?

Author : Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore
Publisher : AK Press
Page : 226 pages
File Size : 54,9 Mb
Release : 2012-01-31
Category : Social Science
ISBN : 9781849350891

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Why Are Faggots So Afraid of Faggots? by Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore Pdf

Gay culture has become a nightmare of consumerism, whether it's an endless quest for Absolut vodka, Diesel jeans, rainbow Hummers, pec implants, or Pottery Barn. Whatever happened to sexual flamboyance and gender liberation, an end to marriage, the military, and the nuclear family? As backrooms are shut down to make way for wedding vows, and gay sexual culture morphs into “straight-acting dudes hangin’ out,” what are the possibilities for a defiant faggotry that challenges the assimilationist norms of a corporate-cozy lifestyle? Why Are Faggots So Afraid of Faggots? challenges not just the violence of straight homophobia but the hypocrisy of mainstream gay norms that say the only way to stay safe is to act straight: get married, join the military, adopt kids! Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore reinvokes the anger, flamboyance, and subversion once thriving in gay subcultures in order to create something dangerous and lovely: an exploration of the perils of assimilation; a call for accountability; a vision for change. A sassy and splintering emergency intervention! Called "startlingly bold and provocative" by Howard Zinn, and described as "a cross between Tinkerbell and a honky Malcolm X with a queer agenda" by The Austin Chronicle, Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore is undoubtedly one of America's most outspoken queer critics. She is the author of two novels, including, most recently, So Many Ways to Sleep Badly, and is the editor of four nonfiction anthologies, including Nobody Passes: Rejecting the Rules of Gender and Conformity and That’s Revolting! Queer Strategies for Resisting Assimilation.

Gaysia

Author : Benjamin Law
Publisher : Cleis Press
Page : 293 pages
File Size : 55,8 Mb
Release : 2014-05-13
Category : Travel
ISBN : 9781627780360

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Gaysia by Benjamin Law Pdf

A gay Asian-Australian man wonders what his life would be like if he grew up in Asia, so he travels to several Asian countries and investigates gay culture in Indonesia, Thailand, China, Japan, Malaysia, Myanmar, and India.

Cruise Control

Author : M S W Robert Weiss, MSW
Publisher : eBookIt.com
Page : 177 pages
File Size : 51,7 Mb
Release : 2013-02
Category : Self-Help
ISBN : 9780985063344

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Cruise Control by M S W Robert Weiss, MSW Pdf

Cruise Control is the premiere book on the growing problem of sex addiction in gay men. This second edition explores how technology has impacted the instant ability to "meet up" and the implications of being in recovery in a committed relationship. Accessible resource for achieving sex addiction recovery including a "30 day test" and a dating plan.

The Best Little Boy in the World

Author : Andrew Tobias,John Reid
Publisher : Ballantine Books
Page : 257 pages
File Size : 55,5 Mb
Release : 1993-05-11
Category : Biography & Autobiography
ISBN : 9780345381767

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The Best Little Boy in the World by Andrew Tobias,John Reid Pdf

The classic account of growing up gay in America. "The best little boy in the world never had wet dreams or masturbated; he always topped his class, honored mom and dad, deferred to elders and excelled in sports . . . . The best little boy in the world was . . . the model IBM exec . . . The best little boy in the world was a closet case who 'never read anything about homosexuality.' . . . John Reid comes out slowly, hilariously, brilliantly. One reads this utterly honest account with the shock of recognition." The New York Times "The quality of this book is fantastic because it comes of equal parts honesty and logic and humor. It is far from being the story of a Gay crusader, nor is it the story of a closet queen. It is the story of a normal boy growing into maturity without managing to get raped into, or taunted because of, his homosexuality. . . . He is bright enough to be aware of his hangups and the reasons for them. And he writes well enough that he doesn't resort to sensationalism . . . ." San Francisco Bay Area Reporter

Ringo Starr

Author : Alan Clayson
Publisher : Sanctuary Publishing
Page : 0 pages
File Size : 55,7 Mb
Release : 1996
Category : Drummers (Musicians)
ISBN : 1860741894

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Ringo Starr by Alan Clayson Pdf

A biography of Ringo Starr offers a glimpse of his private life and professional music career, both with the Beatles and his later musical projects.

Lust, Men, and Meth

Author : David Michael Fawcett
Publisher : S FL Center for Counseling and Therapy, Incorporated
Page : 0 pages
File Size : 51,7 Mb
Release : 2015
Category : Drug abuse
ISBN : 0996257802

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Lust, Men, and Meth by David Michael Fawcett Pdf

Fawcett provides a practical resource for recovery from methamphetamine and the restoration of healthy sex and intimacy. He outlines a path toward healing, describing the phases of physical, emotional, and sexual recovery and provides a broad range of supportive tools from managing triggers to mindfulness.

Discomfortable

Author : A.J. Bond
Publisher : North Atlantic Books
Page : 346 pages
File Size : 45,8 Mb
Release : 2021-09-07
Category : Self-Help
ISBN : 9781623175566

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Discomfortable by A.J. Bond Pdf

The go-to guide to understand and unpack shame: what it is, why we feel it, and how to undo the lies it tells us about ourselves. Are you ready to get Discomfortable? This is a book about shame: what it is, why we have it, and how we can break its hold on our happiness. We all know shame: it's that feeling that tells us that somehow, who we are is inherently wrong. It's more than embarrassment or regret: it shakes us to the core. And most of all, it tells us that we need to be, feel, and act differently in order to be seen, loved, and accepted. Author and "shame-ed" coach AJ Bond takes us through his own shame breakthrough, sharing how he went from I'd rather die than be gay to uncovering and reclaiming his inherent wholeness and worth. With unexpected humor, warmth, and candid personal stories, Bond shows readers: Why shame shows up--the trauma, fixed mindsets, and messaging that give it a foothold How shame tricks you into believing there's something wrong with you, even when you're perfectly right The evolutionary reasons we humans developed a sense of shame (and why it doesn't serve us today) How to manage and deprogram shame through connection, gratitude, and empowered choice How we can re-parent ourselves, be fully seen, and feel fully loved Bond shines a light on this feeling that doesn't want to be seen, heard, or named--and invites us to bring our own shame into the open and release it to reclaim and reframe our lives in a powerful new way.